Glasgow Smiles
by Insanity with Cheese
Summary: See? They keep getting worse and worse!


The Joker isn't like most men, but I'm pretty sure that if you're a guy, you don't skip.

And you don't skip in flowers.

And you don't skip holding hands with a girl you don't really like.

And you probably consider it as torture if your 'girlfriend' is singing a Justin Bieber song.

iBaby! Baby! Baby! Ohhh yeah!

Baby! Baby! Baby! Ohhh yeah!

Baby! Baby! Baby! Ohhh yeah!

Thought you'd always be mine! Mine!/i

iSAVE ME! SAVE ME! SAVE ME! OHHH PLEASE!

SAVE ME! SAVE ME! SAVE ME! OHHH PLEASE!

SAVE ME! SAVE ME! SAVE ME! OHHH PLEASE!

PUT ME OUT MY MISER-RAY! HEY!/i

To The Joker, a 'date' would be killing people side by side, then kissing passionately as a hospital was blown up to tiny bits. Then, after kissing, they would run from the police, meanwhile, savoring the sounds of screams in the distance, and the blood running down like rain. The Joker's heart fluttered when he thought of a date like that.

"What did I do to deserve Harley Quinn?...Oh, yeah."

To Mista J's dismay, he and Harley finally reached the flower bed for their stupid little 'date'.

"Welcome to Hell." The Joker muttered under his breath.

"What was that, puddin'?

"Nothing..."

The Joker used to find it funny when Harley Quinn did warm-ups before she skipped. It always reminded him of TAE-BO exercises. But, Harley started wearing her villain clothes more often in public, just like Mista J did.

But you see, Harley Quinn's villain costume fits her like a second skin. And when she worked out, it's kinda...

Mista J slapped himself in the head, trying to get out the horrifying, mentally disturbing thought of Harley Quinn working out. He shivered at the thought of touching Harley. For about a month after he met Harley, he had nightmares about...

The Joker shook out those awful times. He leaned back against a tree, wondering what he should do tomorrow. Would it be smart to assassinate someone the day he got out of the Asylum?

No. Too risky. He didn't was to blow off his freedom, no matter how much he hated that bastard of a mayor.

But, he felt like doing isomething/i fun tomorrow, but how would he do it without getting caught easily by Batsy?

The Joker's thoughts were interrupted by-

WHOOSH!

THUD!

"AUGH!"

KA-BLAM!

Silence.

The Joker blinked twice, and slowly turned around.

"Harley?"

No response. The only sound was his high, rough voice.

"Harles?"

The Joker whispered, using the pet name he knew she loved.

Still no response.

The Joker was staring to get a foreboding feeling in his stomach. She ialways/i responded to 'Harles'. Always. "Harlene Quinnze-ell! Are you alright?"

He slowly felt his way around the tenebrous night, calling her name. An bat screeched in the moonlight, making The Joker have the familiar yet unwelcome feeling of annoyance and a hint of anxiousness. True, he loathed each and every one of Harley's molecules, but at the same time, he kinda liked her...it often befuddled him.

Anthony couldn't believe it. He just knocked out Harley Quinn.

"Wow..."

Anthony stood dazed as he stared at Harley, blinking twice, and for a brief moment forgot why he was there.

"You?"

Anthony jerked sharply to his right, meeting face-to-face with the Glasgow Smile villain. The Joker lunged forward towards Anthony, punching his left eye. Anthony screamed as he fell to the unforgiving ground, filled with freezing melting snow and burning cold water. Anthony tasted the metallic tang of blood, so familiar, yet so unwelcome.

The Joker leaned over the bleeding teen, holding a knife, so old that you couldn't tell which parts of the knife was dull and which was blood.

"Where's Batman?" The Joker demanded, the knife inches away from the corners of Anthony's trembling mouth. "I know he's here..."

Anthony blinked, his face turning white, as though The Joker had stabbed him to death. "I-I-It's just...just me."

The Joker threw Robin in the air and slammed him by the tree, placing the knife back at the corner of the boy's mouth.

"You know what I've noticed?" The Joker's chilling voice loomed around Anthony's mind. "People tend to...ismile/i when they're lying."

The Clown Prince nicked Robin's mouth, giving him a sharp, minor cut. Placing his grass for hair behind his ears, The Joker muttered, "But, I see why you lie...you wish to preserve the fun...let ole Bats have a sneak attack, eh?"

The Joker placed its trusty knife back in its sheath, but still kept Robin prisoner.

"You look nervous."

Anthony blinked. Staring into The Joker's cold green eyes. "It's the-"  
"Glasgow Smile."

He blinked, but chuckled. "You've heard of it before?"

"Yes..." Anthony didn't reach eye contact when he answer The Joker. "I've seen picture of my grandmother...you..."

"Killed her." The Joker nodded. "First kill at eighteen...now I know the phrase, 'You create your own worst enemy' is damn right. Killed your grandmother and grandfather when Batman was about twelve and your mother was almost fourteen."

"You know who Batman really is?" Anthony perked up, his voice hoarse, as though he had to give a speech in front of a thousand people.

"Bruce Wayne?" The Joker smiled, his Glasgow Smile looked even creepier, and it almost seemed as though it was starting to bleed again. Anthony said nothing, but he bit his lip, fresh blood pouring down his chin.

"I see..."

For a while, the only sounds audible was the sound of Harley stirring and Anthony's stomach clenching in fear for his uncle, his family, but more importantly, himself.

"Robin...how long have we been fighting each other?"

Anthony said nothing. He wanted to break away from him, to scream, but he couldn't do it. He iwouldn't/i do it. No, he had to stay strong. Batman doesn't scream like a coward whenever The Joker keeps him bounded in chains, a giant bandsaw whirring.

"Answer my damn question."

"Four years...I was twelve..."

"Four years." The Joker repeated. "To me, it seems like yesterday you screamed in fear at my scars...but the sad thing is, Robin, I knew who Batsy was his whole 'Batman' career, and yet, I don't know who iyou/i are..."

The Joker reached forward for Robin's mask.


End file.
